So perhaps Vinny realized that he had no business being in the GM conversation. Today, he announced that he was removing his candidacy for the job. Part of me thinks it's fucking arrogant for the guy to remove himself from a job he was grossly under-qualified for, but the other part of me is thankful because the moronic Habs might have hired him.
For the last few days, the rumors have been flying left right and center. Roy wants the job but with veto power on hockey decisions. Pat Brisson has been approached. Marc Bergevin is interested. It never ends. And thanks to Molson's secret policy, it's going to be like this for a few more weeks. I for one hope they go way outside the box.
In other news, Carey Price has a concussion. This is actually not horrible news. Shut him down for the year, let him get his rest and he'll have plenty of time to reload for next year. There was no point in sending him out there for the last three games. Had this happened in any other season, it would've crippled us.
Tonight we welcome the Lightning and perhaps our next GM in Julien Brisebois. One more loss and we're guaranteed no worse than 28th overall. Go Bolts! Although I still want Pacioretty to score. How about 7-6 Tampa. Everybody happy?
Wednesday, April 4, 2012
Monday, April 2, 2012
79 down, 3 to go.
Well, this is it. The home stretch. 3 games to go and oh so close to the #2 pick and an 18% chance at #1. I can taste it. The Oilers helped us out last night and finishing 15th in the East seems pretty likely. It sickens me to be so excited to finish last, but it is necessary. No pain no gain. Although we've felt nothing but pain for the last 18 years with this team and have gotten no gain. Interesting...
But overshadowing our chase for last place is now the GM (and coach) search. Let's not kid ourselves. There is no way Cunneyworth is back. And not because he doesn't speak french. Have you ever seen an interim coach who saw his team slide from 9th to 15th come back? Ain't happening. So for the next 2 months, the rumor mill will be working overtime as the list of candidates for the jobs grows. The odd move in all this is the retention of Serge Savard as consiglieri. The guy is 97 years old and 17 years removed from being employed by the team. Is he really the best person to advise a president still wet behind the ears? And to make things even more awkward, he already contradicted his boss by announcing to the world that the next GM will speak french moments after Molson said he would not limit himself to that criteria. Only in Montreal could this shit happen. It seems the Damphousse-Roy tandem has the early edge and I for one am against it.
Roy as coach is ok. They guy has paid his dues in the Q and has undeniable qualities as a leader and motivator. He is a risky choice but nobody can argue his merit. He is also very skilled at ordering his goalies to skate across the ice and lay the smackdown on the opposing netminder that clearly wants nothing to do with it.
But can someone tell me what the hell qualifies Damphousse to be a GM? Because he was a player rep? Because he's a business man? Gimme a break. For once I would like this team to hire someone that other teams would consider. A guy that other teams wish they had. I don't see any offers lined up for Damphousse. There is no way he deserves to be in the drivers seat that fast. Vinny, if you wanna be a GM, go be someone's assistant for a few years and then we'll talk.
Geoff, at this point, I just hope you go with the best guy and not the most popular guy. You have a chance to set the tone to your reign as owner and president. Let everybody know that since you put up the $600M, you can do whatever you want and if the press doesn't like it, they can go cover the Impact.
But overshadowing our chase for last place is now the GM (and coach) search. Let's not kid ourselves. There is no way Cunneyworth is back. And not because he doesn't speak french. Have you ever seen an interim coach who saw his team slide from 9th to 15th come back? Ain't happening. So for the next 2 months, the rumor mill will be working overtime as the list of candidates for the jobs grows. The odd move in all this is the retention of Serge Savard as consiglieri. The guy is 97 years old and 17 years removed from being employed by the team. Is he really the best person to advise a president still wet behind the ears? And to make things even more awkward, he already contradicted his boss by announcing to the world that the next GM will speak french moments after Molson said he would not limit himself to that criteria. Only in Montreal could this shit happen. It seems the Damphousse-Roy tandem has the early edge and I for one am against it.
Roy as coach is ok. They guy has paid his dues in the Q and has undeniable qualities as a leader and motivator. He is a risky choice but nobody can argue his merit. He is also very skilled at ordering his goalies to skate across the ice and lay the smackdown on the opposing netminder that clearly wants nothing to do with it.
But can someone tell me what the hell qualifies Damphousse to be a GM? Because he was a player rep? Because he's a business man? Gimme a break. For once I would like this team to hire someone that other teams would consider. A guy that other teams wish they had. I don't see any offers lined up for Damphousse. There is no way he deserves to be in the drivers seat that fast. Vinny, if you wanna be a GM, go be someone's assistant for a few years and then we'll talk.
Geoff, at this point, I just hope you go with the best guy and not the most popular guy. You have a chance to set the tone to your reign as owner and president. Let everybody know that since you put up the $600M, you can do whatever you want and if the press doesn't like it, they can go cover the Impact.
Thursday, March 29, 2012
Pierre Gauthier - Strange to the End
A very strange period in Habs history has come to an end.
Stranger than Juha Lind having a child with Gino Odjick.
It was as weird as it gets. To take a page out of Lewis Black's book, it was so weird that the left side of your brain looks at the right side of your brain and says, it's pretty dark in here.
The weird press conferences where almost no information whatsoever was conveyed to the media and the public, by extension. The sudden introduction of Mister into his lexicon when naming players then not only exacerbated the disconnect between the GM and the fans, it begged questions about a chronic social awkwardness that stands in stark contrast with the nature of the position he occupied.
Unfit. Unwelcoming. Unrelenting.
There was no yield in Pierre Gauthier's cone of silence. Over time, he isolated himself to the point of alienation where only echoes of his pale voice would bounce off its lonely walls.
Darren Dregger today said that a dark cloud, a black hole had enveloped the city during Gauthier's tenure. How damning is that assessment. Is that a brand Geoff Molson could market comfortably?
Gauthier cut any emotional ties with the media with whom that social apprehension became pathological. He became increasingly disliked by the fans who could not thread the man into the emotional fabric hatched out of their love for a long line of wonderful people that drew a paycheque from this organization.
It this is just about the man's character. We haven't even gotten to the hockey part yet.
And there is no need to really. No point in rehashing here what you can read elsewhere. Most hockey moves were highly questionable, if not damaging to the team for years to come. Including this year, the team had a remaining invested total value of 109 million dollars in 4 of their top 6 forwards. Last week, those 4 guys together had amassed 79 points in 167 games. That's an average of 38 points per season per player. It's incomprehensible. And then the moves made concerning the blue line, in and of themselves, are all grounds for dismissal.
In the failure that he was from a hockey standpoint, Gauthier never showed any redeeming qualities that coaxed the fans into patience. They just didn't like him and in his highly spotlit position he did very little to be liked.
It was the only move to make. That post-mortem would have been a scathing exercise, and there was no point in putting the man through it. In the end Geoff Molson today became the real owner and finally arrived on the scene to make his voice heard. Strong, reassuring, emphatic with a fan base the next GM will have to cater to with a demeanour far more aware, respectful and forthcoming than Pierre Gauthier was ever able to exhibit.
Today is the first day of the rest of our lives
So there you have it. Pierre Gauthier is gone like a fart in the wind. He leaves us with a legacy of diahrea. We've all been clamoring for this since the press conference that saw him get the job. Let's hope this is not just for Pierre. We all know Cunneyworth is gone and there's no rush to do it, but we need to see a major house cleaning on the 7th floor. Gauthier, Gainey, Jones, Fargus, all of them. Ok, so I made up Jones and Fargus, but you get the idea. They need a real fresh start.
Usually, the media never rejoices when someone loses his job. It's classless. And that's why I'm doing it. Rejoicing doesn't even begin to explain how we feel here at the PKists. We're well past joy, happiness and even euphoria. We're now bordering on orgasmic. This moron screwed this up bigtime. The trades for Kaberle and Bourque were fireable offenses. The Gomez signing was under Gainey's watch but Gauthier was our head of pro scouting, so he gets equal blame. But those moves pale in comparaison to the rage he ignites in me when he addresses everyone as Mister. That shit was infuriating.
So let's analyze the timing of this move. It's completely retarded. Classic Molson. What the hel happened in the last few weeks that convinced you to do this? We've known for months that this was a train wreck beyond repair. You should've either done this a long time ago or the day after the season. If this move jolts our players into a 4 game winning streak, I will hold Geoff Molson personally responsible. The consequence of which is absolutely nothing.
But let's not dwell on the details. Gauthier is out and we can finally start looking at the future of this team with some optimism. It was really impossible to feel any excitement about our team with him in the picture. He was a dark cloud of feces hovering over our city. He was a black hole sucking all enthusiasm out of the air.
So who's the poor bastard who gets his job?
Let the speculation begin!!
Usually, the media never rejoices when someone loses his job. It's classless. And that's why I'm doing it. Rejoicing doesn't even begin to explain how we feel here at the PKists. We're well past joy, happiness and even euphoria. We're now bordering on orgasmic. This moron screwed this up bigtime. The trades for Kaberle and Bourque were fireable offenses. The Gomez signing was under Gainey's watch but Gauthier was our head of pro scouting, so he gets equal blame. But those moves pale in comparaison to the rage he ignites in me when he addresses everyone as Mister. That shit was infuriating.
So let's analyze the timing of this move. It's completely retarded. Classic Molson. What the hel happened in the last few weeks that convinced you to do this? We've known for months that this was a train wreck beyond repair. You should've either done this a long time ago or the day after the season. If this move jolts our players into a 4 game winning streak, I will hold Geoff Molson personally responsible. The consequence of which is absolutely nothing.
But let's not dwell on the details. Gauthier is out and we can finally start looking at the future of this team with some optimism. It was really impossible to feel any excitement about our team with him in the picture. He was a dark cloud of feces hovering over our city. He was a black hole sucking all enthusiasm out of the air.
So who's the poor bastard who gets his job?
Let the speculation begin!!
GAUTHIER FIRED!!!!
HOLY SHIT. I swear that today was the day I had set for my comeback. But then this news came in. March 29th is now an official holiday for the rest of time.
Stay tuned for reaction.
Stay tuned for reaction.
Tuesday, March 27, 2012
Thursday, March 22, 2012
The Morning Bell for Thursday March 22, 2012
Today's ringer, maybe even this year's ringer: Fabrice Muamba
Dead for 78 minutes and now resting in a London Hospital. It's an astounding story. After watching paramedics work on him for what seemed to be an agonizing forever, most of us thought tragedy had struck. Well it only lasted 78 minutes. Can you believe Muamba's luck that a cardiologist was sitting in the crowd when it happened and lead the charge on the pitch and in the ambulance. It's a story that reminds us that while we all love sports, they serve as a pale mirror of real, significant life.
The Habs played last night, but it was 30 degrees in Montreal. So while the Habs are beating records in futility, the city of Montreal is shattering records in celsius.
I would venture that last night may have been the least watched Canadiens game of the year. Meaning this post would make for the least read post of the year. So thank you, both of you, for reading this. 8th time this year the Habs have been held off the scoresheet. One more and we've got another record.
The Toronto Star is saying that GM Brian Burke may start feeling hot under his unbuttoned collar.
New York City is becoming home to the world's fundamentalist Christian athletes as Tim Tebow joins Jeremy Lin in the plight to avoid Broadway hookers and incessant Manhattan orgies. Good luck fellas.
Reports out of Montreal have it that the team will be buying out Scott Gomez. Hmmmm, on another note, I've decided to put my 11-month old son in a car seat instead of letting him ride shotgun with me. Nice job by the Habs for exacting vengeance on Tyler Myers for the hit that put an end to Gomez's career as a Hab.
Retire Tyler Myer's jersey now.
Dead for 78 minutes and now resting in a London Hospital. It's an astounding story. After watching paramedics work on him for what seemed to be an agonizing forever, most of us thought tragedy had struck. Well it only lasted 78 minutes. Can you believe Muamba's luck that a cardiologist was sitting in the crowd when it happened and lead the charge on the pitch and in the ambulance. It's a story that reminds us that while we all love sports, they serve as a pale mirror of real, significant life.
The Habs played last night, but it was 30 degrees in Montreal. So while the Habs are beating records in futility, the city of Montreal is shattering records in celsius.
I would venture that last night may have been the least watched Canadiens game of the year. Meaning this post would make for the least read post of the year. So thank you, both of you, for reading this. 8th time this year the Habs have been held off the scoresheet. One more and we've got another record.
The Toronto Star is saying that GM Brian Burke may start feeling hot under his unbuttoned collar.
New York City is becoming home to the world's fundamentalist Christian athletes as Tim Tebow joins Jeremy Lin in the plight to avoid Broadway hookers and incessant Manhattan orgies. Good luck fellas.
Reports out of Montreal have it that the team will be buying out Scott Gomez. Hmmmm, on another note, I've decided to put my 11-month old son in a car seat instead of letting him ride shotgun with me. Nice job by the Habs for exacting vengeance on Tyler Myers for the hit that put an end to Gomez's career as a Hab.
Retire Tyler Myer's jersey now.
Tuesday, March 20, 2012
The Morning Bell for who the hell gives a shit
Hello PK'ists. I have to apologize for our effort this week. But can you blame us? What the hell else is there to say about this season? Not making the playoffs is bad enough, but not being comfortably in last place is even worse. As the Habs start flirting with the real disaster of finishing 25th or 26th, we are here contemplating what to write about such a season. We've said it all. Gomez sucks, Markov is made of paper, Desharnais-Cole-Pacioretty have been the only constant, PK finally salvaged his season, Price was good, Emelin was a nice surprise. I got nothin' else.
You know things are slow when the airwaves are dominated by unconfirmed reports that Patrick Roy will be the next coach. I wanna meet this blogger who gets people talking like that by pulling stories out of his ass. This makes no sense at all. Not because Patrick is a bad choice (god knows there is a long list of pros and cons), but because there is no way you can hire him without knowing who your GM is. You can't saddle the new GM with such a polarizing figure like #33. Pierre Gauthier better be on his way out. If he is, you can't hire the new GM and tell him this:
Molson: Hi new GM. Your coach is Patrick Roy. He's a god in this city and everybody likes him more than you. You can't fire him or tell him what to do. Come to think of it, he's your boss. He likes to be called Saint-Patrick and takes coffee black.
To make things even worse, I used to love seeing the Leafs get killed, but now, they are dangerously close to last place, so I have no choice but hope they win. This season has been pure torture.
You know things are slow when the airwaves are dominated by unconfirmed reports that Patrick Roy will be the next coach. I wanna meet this blogger who gets people talking like that by pulling stories out of his ass. This makes no sense at all. Not because Patrick is a bad choice (god knows there is a long list of pros and cons), but because there is no way you can hire him without knowing who your GM is. You can't saddle the new GM with such a polarizing figure like #33. Pierre Gauthier better be on his way out. If he is, you can't hire the new GM and tell him this:
Molson: Hi new GM. Your coach is Patrick Roy. He's a god in this city and everybody likes him more than you. You can't fire him or tell him what to do. Come to think of it, he's your boss. He likes to be called Saint-Patrick and takes coffee black.
To make things even worse, I used to love seeing the Leafs get killed, but now, they are dangerously close to last place, so I have no choice but hope they win. This season has been pure torture.
Saturday, March 17, 2012
Have you ever seen people so happy after a tie?
The impact scored their first MLS goal today in what was a great moment for soccer in Montreal. 50,000 ethnic people made the courageous journey to the big O. I guess most of them haven't seen the news lately. Are they nuts? That's like going to a game in Bosnia. You never know when a huge cement pillar will crush you like a cockroach.
If there was ever a year for the Habs to miss the playoffs, this is it. The Impact would have 4 greeks watching them if the Habs were making a push for the playoffs, or dare I say a cup run. It sucks but that's the way it is. Personally, I find soccer played outside the World cup and the Euro is insanely boring. There's something about wating 90 minutes for a goal that doesn't sit right with me. And the fact that some guys are walking. But hey, that's me.
In any case, let's enjoy this moment. It will probably be a tough season for the Impact, and that's to be expected for any expansion franchise. I fully support them, although I ain't dragging my ass all the way to the east end to watch them.
If there was ever a year for the Habs to miss the playoffs, this is it. The Impact would have 4 greeks watching them if the Habs were making a push for the playoffs, or dare I say a cup run. It sucks but that's the way it is. Personally, I find soccer played outside the World cup and the Euro is insanely boring. There's something about wating 90 minutes for a goal that doesn't sit right with me. And the fact that some guys are walking. But hey, that's me.
In any case, let's enjoy this moment. It will probably be a tough season for the Impact, and that's to be expected for any expansion franchise. I fully support them, although I ain't dragging my ass all the way to the east end to watch them.
What's the point??
The point. Such a simple concept. You get two for winning, none for losing. Unless of course to lose in overtime. Or the shootout. That's why Americans hate this game. Would you ever start following a sport if your local team's record was 25-16-7-9??? Who the hell has time for all that analysis.
Speaking of points, let's discuss how a few measly points could spell the difference between a successful shitty season and and an unsuccessful shitty season. The Habs banked another useless point last night by having the game go to OT. Remember when this season was a disaster but we were at least comfortably in 28th place with a good shot at 29th? Well those days are over. The recent moronic successes of this team has tightened things up. We are no longer in last place in our conference and just a few points separate us from 25th place. So instead of the silver lining of a top 3 pick, we will get a much riskier top 6 pick. And all for what? I'll give you a hint. It rhymes with wheat buckall.
Tonight is the biggest game of the season. WE HAVE TO LOSE. For the love of god, just lose. Play Keberle 58 minutes and put Blunden on the first line. Pacioretty in nets and Cole a healthy scratch. Do whatever it takes, but stay in the basement of the eastern conference. With 10 games to go, we can easily find ourselves with the 7th or 8th pick in the draft, and that would be tragic. We have a chance for a fresh start, don't screw it all up for a mirage.
I swear on my life, if the leafs have a better pick than us in the draft, I will go on a murderous rampage.
Happy St-Patrick's day, Motherfuckers.
Speaking of points, let's discuss how a few measly points could spell the difference between a successful shitty season and and an unsuccessful shitty season. The Habs banked another useless point last night by having the game go to OT. Remember when this season was a disaster but we were at least comfortably in 28th place with a good shot at 29th? Well those days are over. The recent moronic successes of this team has tightened things up. We are no longer in last place in our conference and just a few points separate us from 25th place. So instead of the silver lining of a top 3 pick, we will get a much riskier top 6 pick. And all for what? I'll give you a hint. It rhymes with wheat buckall.
Tonight is the biggest game of the season. WE HAVE TO LOSE. For the love of god, just lose. Play Keberle 58 minutes and put Blunden on the first line. Pacioretty in nets and Cole a healthy scratch. Do whatever it takes, but stay in the basement of the eastern conference. With 10 games to go, we can easily find ourselves with the 7th or 8th pick in the draft, and that would be tragic. We have a chance for a fresh start, don't screw it all up for a mirage.
I swear on my life, if the leafs have a better pick than us in the draft, I will go on a murderous rampage.
Happy St-Patrick's day, Motherfuckers.
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