Bathing Babies and Buffalo - A Habs/Sabres Game Preview

So Don's Cherries and I found ourselves in very similar situations, being metrosexual men of the times. Modern Men, men women want to marry and have many babies with. And as modern men, we espouse modern thinking, like hell ya bring on gay marriage, and of course we endorse a black president and of course Entourage would make for an intellectually earth shattering movie.

You see Don's Cherries and I (we'll discuss Panger tomorrow...you won't want to miss that - and GG tells all on the ledge here) both have young children. Very young. To be honest, DC and I are not married to one another although our wives may have something to say about that. But DC and I click because we have children and we parent the bejeesus out of them. Spokes people for Gerber call us everyday to take pictures of us because they want a new logo; DC and I both cradling the Gerber baby.

This game review, yes this is what it is, comes to you courtesy of both DC and I not being able to post sooner. I called DC an hour ago, I said I'm alone with the baby, I can't post now and I have to give the one with baby man boobs a bath. His response to me is bathed in symmetrical realism. "I can't post right now, I've got to give the baby a bath".

Evidently, DC and I aren't living it up Don Draper style telling the women what to do while we sleep with our mistresses. We bathe our babies before we post. And then we dry them, and we put zincofax on their baby butts and we sing to them to deter them from possibly peeing on themselves. A rush against time and baby bladders, baby bladders you should know having the patience of a 20 year old man with ADD on a cocaine binge.

Now you must take cognizance of one fact. The baby bath is a scary place to be. There is water and a baby, for starters not my favourite combination. Then there is water and urine. The urine is usually introduced into the water early into the bathing process. One has to make amends with this very quickly and look beyond the fact that yes, my child is taking a bath in his own pee. Then there's the head bumping on the tub fear. Will baby jolt his head back as water splashes into his face and crash his head on the edge of the baby tub? And then you can't forget the jolting forward and splashing face first in the water. Will you fish him out the water quick enough before he ingests a lethal dose of soapy urine infested water?  And then to make it all perfectly harmoniously terrifying there's the Cirque du Soleil acrobatic wonder that is taking a slippery soapy baby out if his bath and draping him in a warm towel without dropping him in horror to the floor.

I think this draws a much wanted comparison, if we, DC and I, are taking our kids to their baths, can the Habs bathe in victory tonight?

Can they wash the mediocrity out of their game?

Really.

If the Habs took a page out of your bloggers' books and acted like responsible adults they would take the business to the tub. Rub-a-dub-dub style. Wash your children, you Habs. Be mindful, be adults. Stop playing in your own end like it's that crazy freaky colour ball zone at Ikea and make the sheet of ice you play on the tub you bathe your children in; the place you go to become men.