Wednesday, January 11, 2012

So Mach Meny Thenk You Mentr...Na!!!!....Fak You Mentreal!!!!!!!!


You sey goudby to me Mentreal??!! To me Jaro?!!

I take Canediens teem to final of four and then coch Martoun and Ganey and meneger Gothier say ok Jaro good play Jaro, see you soon Jaro, have fun in beaches of St-Louey Jaro!

THEY NO BEACHES IN ST-LOUEY COCH MARTOUN!!!

So I move to Louey Blue teem to pley hackey. I take my girlfriend bland girl who lav me mach and sey Jaro, you so golie, I follow you to Louey and we become femily there together. Ok, Ok, girlfriend bland, you come with me to Louey too and I sey I lav you everyday so you wash my clothes and ears.

I remember before to leave Mentreal I go to sport shop to sign my name. So mach fun for me Jaro. I sign, Cari has hepoutatis, Love Jaro! Or Stay Strong, not like pounis of Cari, Love Jaro. Or Thenk you for the memorees, and for the mamorees of Cari girlfriend, Love Jaro.

So great day for to sign my name! I even sign my name on boob of women who sey to me Jaro that she come to Huey Louey with me and wash my ears too!

Everyting so to great for me Jaro in Louey bluey. I see rainbow from my balcony everyday! Big white rainbow that never go away even if no rain or sun! So weird rainbow in Louey, just big and white with no colors!!!! Oh Louey, you so rainbow!!!

We came to Mentreal last nite and I go back to my gol at bell centre. Mentreal with no Jaro pley like my cousin in Bratislava who play bleck ops on box x. she so bad!! I sey cousin, you no choose goldfish to kill chilean terrorist?!!! Oh cousin! You so chilean!!!!!

Louey pley so good we win stanley cap for sure this year. Mentreal win maybe tickets to Teylor Swif cancert.

Last nite was so Jaro! Mentreal same teem. Andrei still have poopilepsie, and Ploukanec still from bad neyborhood in czech republic and went to public school, and Poukay still think he have to moonwak on ice to score gol and Hal Gill still bump head everywere he go!!!! Gill! you so Eifel! And Cammoulari who have amnesia of brain and forget to score gols.

And my friend Cari. Stupid, fat wale ass huge ice cream face, hipoupatamous mouth, ugly cowboy ooh look at me i have hat of dally parton and bobs like her too fat wale Cari fat wale.

Cari pley so bad again last nite. My gad I think Cari need to play banjo all of life. Maybe he pley song and we sell it with free can of tuna for my Jaro busness!!!!

Last nite, ploukinec from bad neyborhood come to me Jaro on brekaway. SAVE JARO!!!!

Then stupid bland labrador dog Larzeller try to score. SAVE JARO!

AND POUKAY the dancing machine....SAVE JARO!!!!

I make 326 saves last nite and Cari have 43 gols behind to his ass!!!! Then fans pick me Jaro star 1 of game and I go out and i raise my hand and one finger in my glove!!!!!! Hahahaha, no like Ferrence stupid mankey who forget Jaro trick!!!!

Goodby again Mentreal! See you in 2 years when I came back with Vajina trophee, Peter Jenings, Stanley cap, another stanley cap this one maybe a bit smaller, lady bing my new girlfriend (sorry mister bing!!!! hahahaha she mine now!!!!!), MVP, and new recipee for stew I make for coch Hitchcock. Best name coch! Teem call me Jarocock now. If you proud of it, why no put it in your name??? No Cariwalefatassicecreamfacefatwale?

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

Amazing. So worth the wait. Thank you HF4

Anonymous said...

I'd say worth the 3-0 loss even

Steve said...

They do look like contenders, maybe they need some PP specialists, or puck control masters. Or even a washed up Jedi Knight

juce said...

HF4
You really should do stand-up!

UK3X said...

@4 - Another classic! Worth waiting for. Shame he won't be back for a couple years!

Anonymous said...

so the Bruins aren't even wrothy of mention

Talk about next-level shit dude

Dave said...

@ anon: we're running low here with a fourth of us on vacation, another fourth swamped in work, a fourth who has been kidnapped by Contras, and a fourth who is actually making money to photoshop.

But I agree, it's time to discuss the Bruins, bless their hearts.

Anonymous said...

all is forgiven

just getting ready for b's by being a total dick

Dave said...

there you go, anon. Post is up. Thanks for being on top of this crib.