Sunday, October 30, 2011

Game Review. These losers won the Stanley Cup??

This is by far the best game review of this young season. Why you ask? Because we beat the Bruins again?? Not really. Is it because the Habs have clawed back from the dead and are 2 points out of 8th? Nope. It's because Perry Pearn is officially the new Devil. The Habs are clearly the best team in the NHL without him. This will be proven after we go 71-0 the rest of the way. Ok, that's enough Pearn abuse. He knows what he did.

Now, about this game. I was at the game last night but not in my ususal season tickets. I left the crowded masses of the white section and enjoyed the game from a different perspective. I had an all access pass to the press box before the game, the alumni lounge in between periods, and Jackie's press conference after the game. And the seats? Right behind Carey's net! And when I say right behind, I mean I'm kissing the glass. My knees would get crunched by the boards at every hit. I could tell that Chara ate a souvlaki earlier. I could hear Carey humming Hank Williams tunes in between whistles. That's how close.

Watching it from there was truly an amazing experience, and I'll tell you why. When you're watching on TV, or even at the Bell Center from anywhere north of the 15th row, it just looks like some millionnaires playing hockey. From down there, it's war. The intensity is off the charts. Not just when they score or after a big hit, ALL THE TIME. You can see it in their faces. Money doesn't matter, it's all about competing, ripping the other guy's head off and winning. After every whistle, they're in each other's faces whispering sweet nothings into their ears. And by sweet nothings, I mean the most disgusting, vial, inhumane things I have ever heard. For instance, did you know that Milan Lucic thinks Travis Moen is a (expletive) piece of feces who likes to perform oral sex on other men? Or that Josh Gorges thinks Brad Marchand is a little masturbator who needs to get sodomized? Well, of course you did. Everybody knows that.

Watching 3 periods from there made me realize that at the end of the day, these are regular guys that are just playing a game. They just play it way better than us and as if their lives depended on it. I don't really know how else to explain it. It's seems so much more human down there when you're not so removed from the action. When the fight between Moen and Thornton happened 6 feet from me, I thought ot myself: the next time some goon says he's not trying to hurt the other guy, I'm gonna lose it!

So all in all, great effort by the boys tonight. I'm a little disappointed in the way they let it get close, but hell, we just beat the Bruins twice in a row and spanked Philly. Anybody who complains about that is an idiot. As much heat as I gave this team after the Halak trade, if Eller keeps progressing like this, we're gonna have a nice slice of humble pie all together. Killer shot on his goal and Rask made a retarded save that 99 times out of 100 goes in. He still has a couple of brainfarts every so often, but with hands like that, I can deal with the mistakes. He's gonna be just fine. Carey's back on track (even if they hit 3 posts), so that's one less thing to worry about and it just seems like these guys have finally relocated their balls and their will to compete.

5 days off coming up... couldn't have come at a worse time. As a parting gift, I give you... Spacek's ass. Enjoy.


7 comments:

neverbeenpkissed said...

Your unique vantage point last night elegantly illustrates what Pierre Houde recently referred to as 'banal realities for fans of this game': 1. the incredibly thin line between winning and losing in today's intensely competitive NHL and 2., the ease with which fans, the media and social networks dilute the fierce essence of the game through mindless propaganda. In the Habs camp, la grogne generale ceases for now. We can say safely say we've shown some true grit. But don't go giving Jeff Bridges his Oscar just yet.

moeman said...

Awesome perspective. Thank God it wasn't Hank Williams Jr.

Number31 said...

Now I know why they were losing all those games... Didn't have Spacek to cast his magic spell on the Gods of Posts and Crossbars. Warlock.

Steve said...

Up close and personal rock every time. Plane the parade, pay cash.

Steve said...

A Halloween photo shop Bannanzi. And GG how about a Chocula for Halloween?

System Chocula Horror Show.

Goat:
How d'you do, I
See you've met my
Faithful handyman.
He's just a little brought down
because when you knocked
He thought you were the puck control man.
Don't get strung up by the way I look.
Don't judge a book by its cover.
I'm not much of a manager by the light of day
But by night I'm one hell of a Vermonter.
I'm just a sweet useless tit
With French Fluent, infireable.
Let me show you around
Without making a sound.
You look like you're both pretty groovy.
Or if you want something visual
That's not too abysmal,
We could take in an old Jacques Demers movie.

Cole:
I'm glad we caught you in need,
Could I please use my speed?
We're both in a bit of a hurry.

Nokia:
Am I back in the NHL?

Cole:
I'll just sit on the bench,
Then go back to the car.
I got 4 million I don’t have to worry.

Chocula:
Well I got you down flat, well, how `bout that?
Well, babies, don't you panic.
By the light of the notepad it'll all seem alright.
I'll get you a Darche mechanic.
I'm just a life sucking coach
From French Fluent, Infireable.
Why don't you stay on the bench?
Goat: Night!!
While I get the system Right
I could show you my favourite obsession.
I've been making a plan
With no fun for the fans
And its good for relieving my... ...tension
I'm just a sweet dim light
From French Fluent, Infireable, ha ha,
HEY, HEY!


So - come up to the lab,
And see Vodkov on the slab.
I see you shiver with antici - (4 seconds) - pation.
But maybe the game
Isn't really to blame.
So I'll remove the Perry Pern. (chuckles)
But not the symptom

GoldenGirl11 said...

Steve, you're one in a million.

Steve said...

@GG my father was a sperm doner and as near as we have been able to figure out, its one in 537,000.