Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Habs prepare for a defining 24 hours. Paging Jack Bauer.

In 29 hours, the Canadiens season may look quite different than it does today.  As of right now, the Habs are a good team.  Solid from top to bottom.  But all the experts will tell you that they are not top tier.  And it's hard to argue.  The Pens have won 12 straight.  The Bruins, although struggling lately, have the confidence of having gone all the way less than 2 years ago.  The Habs are the new kid on the block.  And they're coming off a horrible season.  So it's normal they don't get the benefit of the doubt 31 games into a 48 game mini season.  But in 29 hours, that could all change.  If they beat these 2 teams, on the road, on back to back nights, the collective ball sack of this group will grow exponentially.  Well, except for Brendan Gallagher.  This blog has often discussed this kid's larger than life balls.  If they get any bigger, Dr. Mulder will need to be brought in for ball reduction surgery.  He'll need a ballectomy.  So Gallagher aside, the team will will have a super sized scrotum.

But the Pittsburgh game has many side stories.  They will be welcoming 2 new acquisitions in Morrow and Murray, not to mention the small detail of a 12 game winning streak.  And just to add a little spice, Therrien will be coaching in Pittsburgh for the first time since being fired the year they won the cup.  Man that's gotta suck.

Shero: Michel, you're out.  The guy aren't responding to your methods anymore.

Therrien: Common Ray, don't listen to dem.  Dey need to be push.

Shero: You're done.  Disco Dan is in.

Therrien: Fuck you asshole.  Your team is nothing but a bunch of crybabies.  You'll never win a cup without me.  If you meet the Red Wings in the finals, they'll destroy you.  Malkin will crumble under the pressure and Fleury can't make the big save when it counts. You'll see.  Can you validate my parking?

Montreal will also welcome Mr. Passover himself Jeff Halpern back to the lineup after his 2 year pilgrimage to synagogues in DC and Manhattan. And if this challenge isn't daunting enough, They'll fly to Boston immediately after for a rendez-vous with the Bruins on Wednesday.

Needless to say, if they win these two games, the Eastern conference will be a 3 headed monster.  Well one of them will be a penis head, but you get the idea.


1 comment:

winning conditions said...

TD Garden -> even karma doesn't want to go there