Friday, November 4, 2011

Game Preview: Habs (if they remember how to skate) vs Sens


Could this be? Game day? The Habs are actually playing tonight?? Since it's been 3 months since our last game, Markov should be ready to restart rehab by now after reshredding his knee while prepping for the running of the bulls in Pamplona. You see, now that our genius GM gave him a 3 year deal, Marky doesn't give a shit anymore...

Ok DC, focus. Big weekend ahead with visits to the city that never sleeps and New York. First up is an always exciting stop in the partying capital of the world (and by that I mean eastern Ontario south of North Bay and east of Perth). Not to crap on our nation's capital, but Crescent street on a snowy January Tuesday night is more happening. Nevertheless, they're one of the league's hottest teams and we must prepare accordingly. On our side is the fact that Daniel "Hab assassin" Alfredsson is out of the lineup. I don't know how many times that guy has scored big goals against us. Also on our side is the fact that Escott is still getting a Mexican Beatdown by his papi and will not be coughing up the puck in our neutral zone. Unfortunately, we're playing an overacheiving team with an inferiority complex.

Poor Ottawa. On one side of the highway, they have the most storied franchise in the NHL and on the other, the best team to never win a cup since 1967. Well, they may never win anything of any importance, but they suck 75% of the media's attention in that province. So basically, Ottawa is Stephen Baldwin. Who? Exactly. The Habs are so Alec. All-time SNL host and star of Beetlejuice. The Leafs are the aborted Baldwin brother. Or Billy Baldwin and Backdraft is the 1967 Stanley Cup.

So...where were we? Ah yes. Ottawa is boring, Toronto sucks and the Habs had sex with Kim Basinger in her prime.

3 comments:

Kmaxx said...

Go Habs Go! Go Habs Go!!! Go Hab Go!!!!

Steve said...

We are both touched by JM, our future could be their past. Wake up Mr Molseon

karimisbetterthanyou said...

Rumor has it that Perry Perns had sex with Basigner as well.